When I play videogames, I am willing to put up with a lot of stupid story elements. Even when I have no real investment in the characters, I will sit through long, boring cutscenes just so I have some kind of context. There is only one game that I have ever played that I have completely skipped any and all cutscenes and dialogue and… well, anything even vaguely story-related. That game is Just Cause 2. There are two reasons for this, both of which epitomize why this is the worst idea for an adaptation that I have ever heard of.
1) There is no story. There is even less of a story in the Just Cause series than in Battleship.
2) It wouldn’t work as anything other than a game. There is no way for a film to capture the ridiculous amazingness of interacting with the (absolutely massive) game worlds, and that interaction is the only reason people play the games.
Apparently it’s old news that this is a thing, but now it’s got a writer, so I get my chance to complain about it. Bryan Edward Hill, known for absolutely nothing, has been set to write the screenplay. It’s an origin story about the main character, because I guess somebody thinks people actually care (they’re wrong). The only way I could see this even potentially being acceptable would be if it was a story-less Michael Bay production. If there are not explosions on screen for literally the entire runtime, it will be a catastrophic failure.
[Via The Hollywood Reporter]
