By [Losing My Virginity articles are reviews written by someone who still hasn’t seen an incredibly popular movie after all these years. LMV reviews are interesting in that they can offer the perspective of a person who’s untainted by the cloud of commonness that surrounded a famous film of the past, and also show how well it has stood the test of time.]
I have a confession of sorts to make. When I said I had never watched a Harry Potter movie, it wasn’t entirely true. It was the winter and a couple of friends and I were “under the influence”. Someone popped in a DVD for Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets and all I can remember is the part when a teacher asks the class to “grasp your mandrake firmly”. I remember it well; my immature friends and I laughed for about ten minutes because of how dirty it sounded. We made a couple of dick jokes and then I passed out, only to wake up with dicks and mandrakes drawn on my face. Times were simpler then.
But now I am older and somewhat sober. It’s due time for me to revisitHarry Potter and the Chamber…
[Losing My Virginity articles are reviews written by someone who still hasn't seen an incredibly popular movie after all these years. LMV reviews are interesting in that they can offer the perspective of a person who's untainted by the cloud of commonness that surrounded a famous film of the past, and also show how well it has stood the test of time.]
I have a confession of sorts to make. When I said I had never watched a Harry Potter movie, it wasn't entirely true. It was the winter and a couple of friends and I were "under the influence". Someone popped in a DVD for Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets and all I can remember is the part when a teacher asks the class to "grasp your mandrake firmly". I remember it well; my immature friends and I laughed for about ten minutes because of how dirty it sounded. We made a couple of dick jokes and then I passed out, only to wake up with dicks and mandrakes drawn on my face. Times were simpler then.
But now I am older and somewhat sober. It’s due time for me to revisit Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets and actually pay attention.
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Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets follows Harry's second year at Hogwarts. Having seen the first one only yesterday, the first 20 minutes of the movie seems formulaic. Harry’s adoptive parents are horrible and just don’t understand (parents, right?). Someone breaks him out and a new semester at Hogwarts is underway. Add a couple of kooky classes and then BOOM, a conflict occurs to get the story underway. Granted I’m only two movies in, but please change the beginning a bit in the next one.
My main complaint about the first movie was the fact that outside the wonderment of the universe, there really wasn’t much in the way of story. Chamber of Secrets fixes that (mostly) as the drama and the mystery manage to sustain my interest. It might be due in part to a heightened sense of danger, considering Chamber of Secrets has a darker tone than Sorcerer’s Stone. It also had interesting themes of racism and lineage injected into the plot, providing a lot more substance to the universe.
I also appreciated that they delved deeper into the history of Hogwarts and it wasn’t so focused on Harry Potter. If anything, it succeeded in fleshing out the universe, providing more tidbits about people like Hagrid and Dumbledore and the Weasley family. My only complaint as far as story is that it dragged a bit and it’s climax was a bit, well, anticlimactic.
The acting has improved slightly in this film but isn't that much of an improvement. It’s awkward that the actors are going through puberty at this point, but the film benefits from this because it gives the audience a sense of the characters' maturity and growth. Every crack in Ron Weasley’s voice sends me into a giggling fit, making him all the more lovable. In terms of lovable characters, Ron has some competition now in the form of Dobby. There’s something so charming about a timid self-deprecating slave who stutters and bends to your every will. Sick? Yes. Adorable? DOUBLE YES.
Speaking of Dobby, the CG has improved since the last film. The creature animations are top notch and made the experience more enjoyable. Sadly, ghosts in this film still look like cardboard cutouts and one specifically will haunt my dreams for the rest of my life (more on that later).
With Chamber of Secrets, the Harry Potter series no longer has to worry about holding the audience’s hand and has time to provide more substance. Though I will be the first to admit that this movie is long and drags a bit, it takes baby steps into becoming a strong film rather than a run of the mill kids movie. It's a small improvement from Harry Potter and the Sorcerer's Stone, enough to keep me sticking around for the next one.
Overall Score: 6.55 – Okay. (6s are just okay. These movies usually have many flaws, didn’t try to do anything special, or were poorly executed. Some will still love 6s, but most prefer to just rent them. Watch more trailers and read more reviews before you decide.)
Random Thoughts:
- Never did I think I would come across a character as annoying as Jar Jar Binks. Of course, I would be proven wrong with the introduction of Moaning Myrtle. Every shrill of her voice made me want to stab my ears with a rusty screwdriver. I believe the way she “moans” was supposed to be humorous, but it was nothing but painful. I had to take a Tylenol just to combat the effect of her awful shrieks.
- Every time someone utters the word “Mud Blood,” I feel offended and dirty. That sh*t sounds downright racist. Considering it was a Malfoy who says it and he's a pale, bleach blond twerp who goes on about "pure blood", it's safe to say that anyone that likes Draco Malfoy is a Nazi sympathizer.
- “Grasp your mandrake firmly” … STILL FUNNY.
- I can't believe I didn't realize this in the last movie, but when I stayed through the credits, imagine my surprise when I found out John Williams did the score. SO AWESOME.
Manana: Harry Potter and the Prisoner of Azkaban. Azka-what?
