Trailer: Total Recall

Yeah, we’re sorry about posting that teaser for the trailer the other day. That was, like, our OTHER April Fools joke for you guys. Haha. You guys really fell for it. Anyways, here’s the “totally” new, “totally” badass trailer for Total Recall, and it’s “totally” legit. Totally.

In this trailer we get to see a little bit of everyone, whereas in the teaser, it was mainly Colin Farrell being a badass. Now you’ve got John Cho being a badass as the Rekall rep and Jessica Biel being, like, hot and stuff. Also, they replaced fat, Brooklynite Harry with a black dude? Say whaaa? I’m not too impressed with anyone’s acting just yet (even Bryan Cranston), but I’m pretty sure they didn’t show the best parts, for which I’m glad. I was kind of impressed near the end when the car started falling and then caught itself in the air once its hover system kicked in, flattening that car. That’s like when Bruce Willis killed a helicopter with a car. Also, during the action, the camerawork looked silky smooth, for all you whiners who complained about The Hunger Games‘ camerawork. Because you’re all babies who can’t process movement or something.

I’m starting to really look forward to this film, despite my professed affection for the Schwarzenegger Total Recall. I can’t wait until August 3rd. I’m going to have to go to Japan and pirate this or something somehow. Maybe I can just implant memories that I’ve already watched it? Do we have a Rekall store around here? They’re about as cheap as getting your eyes done, right?